These are Quotes I have collected from different movies, games, and articles.
Kain: Vae Victus -- suffering to the conquered. Ironic that now I was the one suffering. Not anything as pedestrian as physical pain. Rather the cruel jab of impotent anger -- the hunger for revenge. I didn't care if I was in Heaven or Hell -- all I wanted was to kill my assassins. Sometimes you get what you wish for. The Necromancer Mortanius offered me a chance for vengeance. And like a fool, I jumped at his offer without considering the cost. Nothing is free, not even revenge.
Legacy of Kain: Blood Omen
Who'd win in a wrestling match, Lemmy or God?
Chris Moore: Lemmy. [Rex imitates a game show buzzer] ...God?
Rex: Wrong, dickhead, trick question. Lemmy *IS* God.
Gentlemen, I'd like you to meet your captain, Captain Oveur.
Clarence Oveur: Gentlemen, welcome aboard.
Simon: Captain, your navigator, Mr. Unger, and your first officer, Mr. Dunn.
Clarence Oveur: Unger.
Clarence Oveur: Dunn. Gentlemen, let's get to work.
Simon: Unger, didn't you serve under Oveur in the Air Force?
Unger: Not directly. Technically, Dunn was under Oveur and I was under Dunn.
Simon: So, Dunn, you were under Oveur and over Unger.
Clarence Oveur: That's right. Dunn was over Unger and I was over Dunn.
Unger: So, you see, both Dunn and I were under Oveur, even though I was under Dunn.
Clarence Oveur: Dunn was over Unger, and I was over Dunn
Airplane II the sequel
Lester Burnham: Look at me. Jerking off in the shower. This will be the highlight of my day.
Your father and I were just discussing his day at work. Why don't you tell our
daughter about it, honey?
Lester Burnham: Janie, today I quit my job. And then I told my boss to go fuck himself, and then I blackmailed him for almost sixty thousand dollars. Pass the asparagus.
Carolyn Burnham: Your father seems to think this type of behavior is something to be proud of.
Lester Burnham: And your mother seems to prefer I go through life like a fucking prisoner while she keeps my dick in a mason jar under the sink.
Carolyn Burnham: How dare you speak to me that way in front of her. And I marvel that you can be so contemptuous of me, on the same day that you LOSE your job.
Lester Burnham: Lose it? I didn't lose it. It's not like, "Whoops! Where'd my job go?" I QUIT. Someone pass me the asparagus.
Lester Burnham: I guess I could be pretty pissed off about what happened to me. But it's hard to stay mad when there's so much beauty in the world. Sometimes I feel like I'm seeing it all at once... and it's too much. My heart fills up like a balloon that's about to burst. And then I remember... to relax, and not try to hold on to it. And then it flows through me like rain. And I can't feel anything but gratitude for every single moment of my stupid little life. You have no idea what I'm talking about, I'm sure. Don't worry... you will someday.
Derek Vinyard: We're so hung up on this notion that we have some obligation to help the struggling black man, you know. Cut him some slack until he can overcome these historical injustices. It's crap. I mean, Christ, Lincoln freed the slaves, like, what? 130 years ago. How long does it take to get your act together?
American History X
Patrick Bateman: You are a fucking ugly bitch and I want to stab you to death and play with your blood.
When I see a pretty girl walking down the street, I think two things. One part
wants me to be real nice and sweet and treat her right.
David Van Patten: And what did the other part think?
Patrick Bateman: What her head would look like on a stick!
Patrick Bateman: Do you like Phil Collins? I've been a big Genesis fan ever since the release of their 1980 album, Duke. Before that, I really didn't understand any of their work. Too artsy, too intellectual. It was on Duke where, uh, Phil Collins' presence became more apparent. I think Invisible Touch was the group's undisputed masterpiece. It's an epic meditation on intangibility. At the same time, it deepens and enriches the meaning of the preceding three albums. Christy, take off your robe. Listen to the brilliant ensemble playing of Banks, Collins and Rutherford. You can practically hear every nuance of every instrument. Sabrina, remove your dress. In terms of lyrical craftsmanship, the sheer songwriting, this album hits a new peak of professionalism. Sabrina, why don't you, uh, dance a little. Take the lyrics to Land of Confusion. In this song, Phil Collins addresses the problems of abusive political authority. In Too Deep is the most moving pop song of the 1980s, about monogamy and commitment. The song is extremely uplifting. Their lyrics are as positive and affirmative as, uh, anything I've heard in rock. Christy, get down on your knees so Sabrina can see your ass. Phil Collins' solo career seems to be more commercial and therefore more satisfying, in a narrower way. Especially songs like In the Air Tonight and, uh, Against All Odds. Sabrina, don't just stare at it, eat it. But I also think Phil Collins works best within the confines of the group, than as a solo artist, and I stress the word artist. This is Sussudio, a great, great song, a personal favorite.
Lieutenant Colonel Kilgore: You either surf or you fight.
Lieutenant Colonel Kilgore: If I say it's
safe to surf this beach, it's safe to surf this beach!
Lieutenant Colonel Kilgore: Charlie don't surf!
Lieutenant Colonel Kilgore: You smell that? Do you smell that? ...Napalm, son. Nothing else in the world smells like that. I love the smell of napalm in the morning. You know, one time we had a hill bombed, for twelve hours. When it was all over I walked up. We didn't find one of 'em, not one stinkin' dink body. The smell, you know that gasoline smell, the whole hill. Smelled like... victory. Someday this war's gonna end...
Todd Bowden: All great achievements arose from dissatisfaction. It is the desire to do better, to dig deeper that propels a civilization to greatness. All of us have heard the story of Icarus, the young boy who took the wings his father built for him. Wings that were meant to carry him over the ocean to freedom and used them instead for a joyride. For a brief moment Icarus felt what it was like to live like a god, to touch the sun, to soar above the common man. And for doing so he paid the ultimate price. Like Icarus we too have been given gifts: knowledge, education, experience. And with these gifts comes the responsibility of choice. We alone decide how our talents are bestowed upon the world. This is our destiny and we hold it in the palm of our hands.
Guard: One Swedish-made penis enlarger.
Austin: [to Vanessa] That's not mine.
Guard: One credit card receipt for Swedish-made penis enlarger signed by Austin Powers.
Austin: I'm telling ya baby that's not mine.
Guard: One warranty card for Swedish-made penis enlarger pump, filled out by Austin Powers.
Austin: I don't even know what this is! This sort of thing ain't my bag, baby.
Guard: One book, "Swedish-made Penis Enlargers And Me: This Sort of Thing Is My Bag Baby," by Austin Powers.
Austin Powers International Man of Mystery
Austin: So, Basil, if I travel back to
1969 and I was frozen in 1967, I could go look at my frozen self. But, if I'm
still frozen in 1967, how could I have been unthawed in the 90's and traveled
back to the Sixties? [goes cross-eyed] Oh, no, I've gone
Basil: I suggest you don't worry about those things and just enjoy yourself. [to camera] And, you too.
Dr. Evil: Talk to the hand, 'cause the
face don't wanna hear it anymore.
The President: What hand?
Dr. Evil: You aren't all that and a bag of potato chips.
The President: What are you talking about?
Dr. Evil: Don't go there, girlfriend.
The President: Whose girlfriend?
Dr. Evil: Don't mess with me. I'm one crazy mo fo. I once popped a cop cause he wasn't giving my props in Oak town. I've heard that somewhere.
Austin Powers The Spy Who Shagged Me
O'Hara: Time. Time. What is time? Swiss manufacture it. French hoard it. Italians squander it. Americans say it is money. Hindus say it does not exist. Do you know what I say? I say time is a crook.
Beat The Devil
Adam: What are your qualifications?
Betelgeuse: Ah. Well... I attended Julliard... I'm a graduate of the Harvard business school. I travel quite extensively. I lived through the Black Plague and had a pretty good time during that. I've seen the EXORCIST ABOUT A HUNDRED AND SIXTY-SEVEN TIMES, AND IT KEEPS GETTING FUNNIER EVERY SINGLE TIME I SEE IT... NOT TO MENTION THE FACT THAT YOU'RE TALKING TO A DEAD GUY... NOW WHAT DO YOU THINK?!? You think I'm qualified?
Craig Schwartz: There's a tiny door in
that empty office. It's a portal, Maxine. It takes you inside John Malkovich.
You see the world through John Malkovich's eyes, then, after about fifteen
minutes, you're spit out into a ditch on the side of The New Jersey Turnpike.
Maxine: Sounds delightful. Who the fuck is John Malkovich?
Craig Schwartz: He's an actor. One of the great American actors of the 20th century.
Maxine: What's he been in?
Craig Schwartz: Lots of things. He's very well respected. That jewel thief movie, for example. The point is that this is a very odd thing, supernatural, for lack of a better word. It raises all sorts of philosophical questions about the nature of self, about the existence of the soul. Am I me? Is Malkovich Malkovich? Was the Buddha right, is duality an illusion? Do you see what a can of worms this portal is? I don't think I can go on living my life as I have lived it. There's only one thing to do. Let's get married right away.
Lotte Schwartz: I think it's kinda sexy
that John Malkovich has a portal, y'know, sort of like, it's like, like he has a
vagina. It's sort of vaginal, y'know, like he has a, he has a penis AND a
vagina. I mean, it's sort of like... Malkovich's... feminine side. I like that.
Being John Malkovich
Billy: I feel like an idiot. But I am an idiot, so it kinda works out.
Frank: I'll send you a love letter! Straight from my heart, fucker! You know what a love letter is? It's a bullet from a fucking gun, fucker! You receive a love letter from me, you're fucked forever! You understand, fuck? I'll send you straight to hell, fucker!
Frank Booth: You wanta go for a ride?
Jeffrey Beaumont: No thanks.
Frank Booth: No thanks. What does that mean?
Jeffrey Beaumont: I don't want to go.
Frank Booth: Go where?
Jeffrey Beaumont: On a ride.
Frank Booth: A ride? Hell, that's a good idea. Okay, let's go. Hey, let's go.
Frank Booth: Heineken? Fuck that foreign shit! Pabst Blue Ribbon!
I'm having a shitty day. I'm depressed. Tell me a funny joke.
Rocco: Uh, OK. There's these three guys walking on the beach, a spic, a white guy, and a black guy.
Rocco: Yeah, right. So they find this pot, rub it, and a genie comes out. The genie says you can wish for whatever you want. So he asks the Mexican what he wants, and he says "I want all my people in America to be happy and free, and in Mexico." So the genie goes poof! It's done. Then he says to the black guy --
Vincenzo Lipazzi: Nigger.
Rocco: Yeah, right, he says to the nigger "What do you want?" And the nigger says "I want all my nigger brothers to be back in Africa, and happy and free and everything." So the genie goes poof! And they're all back in Africa. So... I'm not funny today, really, this joke sucks, I know...
Yakavetta: Continue the joke.
Rocco: Uh, so he says to the white guy, "What's your one wish?" And the white guy says, "Wait, you mean to tell me that all the spics and niggers are out of America?" The genie goes yeah, and the white guy says, uh, "I'll have a Coke, then."
[Picking out weapons and gear]
Conner MacManus: You know what we need? Some rope.
Murphy MacManus: What are you, insane?
Conner MacManus: No, I'm serious. Charlie Bronson's always got a rope. In the movies, they've always got rope and they always end up using it.
Murphy MacManus: That's stupid! Name one fucking thing you're gonna need a rope for.
Conner MacManus: It's not what they need it for, they just always need it.
Murphy MacManus: What's this "they" shit? This isn't the movies.
[Murphy picks up a huge commando knife]
Conner MacManus: Oh, is that right, Rambo?
Murphy MacManus: All right, get your stupid fucking rope
The Boondock Saints
Why is it that there is a gun shop on almost every corner in this community?
The Old Man: Why?
Furious Styles: I'll tell you why. For the same reason that there is a liquor store on almost every corner in the black community. Why? They want us to kill ourselves.
Boyz N the Hood
The king desires peace.
William Wallace: Longshanks desires peace?
Princess Isabelle: He declares it to me, I swear it. He proposes that you withdraw your attack. In return he grants you title, estates, and this chest of gold which I am to pay to you personally.
William Wallace: A lordship and titles. Gold. That I should become Judas?
Princess Isabelle: Peace is made in such ways.
William Wallace: Slaves are made in such ways. The last time Longshanks spoke of peace I was a boy. And many Scottish nobles, who would not be slaves, were lured by him under a flag of truce to a barn, where he had them hanged. I was very young, but I remember Longshank's notion of peace.
Frank Pierce: Oh, I see. With all the poor people of this city who wanted only to live and were viciously murdered, you have the nerve to sit here, wanting to die, and not go through with it?! You make me sick!
Frank Pierce: Saving someone's life is
like falling in love. The best drug in the world. For days, sometimes weeks
afterwards, you walk the streets, making infinite whatever you see. Once, for a
few weeks, I couldn't feel the earth -- everything I touched became lighter.
Horns played in my shoes. Flowers fell from my pockets. You wonder if you've
become immortal, as if you've saved your own life as well. God has passed
through you. Why deny it, that for a moment there -- why deny that for a moment
there, God was you?
Frank Pierce: I realized that my training was useful in less than ten percent of the calls, and saving lives was rarer than that. After a while, I grew to understand that my role was less about saving lives than about bearing witness. I was a grief mop. It was enough that I simply turned up.
Bringing Out the Dead
David Kleinfeld: Fuck you and your self-righteous code of the goddamn streets. Did it pull you out of a 30 year stint in only 5 years? No, it didn't, I did. Did it get you acquitted 4 fucking times? No, it didn't, I did, so fuck you, fuck the streets, your whole goddamn world is this big, and there's only one rule, you save your own ass!
Benny Blanco: Maybe you don't remember
Carlito: Maybe I don't remember the last time I blew my nose either!
Nicky Santoro: If you don't have my money for me, I'll crack your fucking head in front of everyone in the bank. And just about the time I get out of jail, hopefully, you'll be coming out of your coma. But guess what? I'll crack your fucking head again! 'Cause I'm fucking stupid! I don't give a fuck about jail! That's my business. That's what I do.
Nicky: A lot of holes in the desert, and a lot of problems are buried in those holes. But you gotta do it right. I mean, you gotta have the hole already dug before you show up with a package in the trunk. Otherwise, you're talking about a half-hour to forty-five minutes worth of digging. And who knows who's gonna come along in that time? Pretty soon, you gotta dig a few more holes. You could be there all fuckin' night.
Ace: [narrating] In Vegas, everybody's gotta watch everybody else. Since the players are looking to beat the casino, the dealers are watching the players. The box men are watching the dealers. The floor men are watching the box men. The pit bosses are watching the floor men. The shift bosses are watching the pit bosses. The casino manager is watching the shift bosses. I'm watching the casino manager. And the eye-in-the-sky is watching us all.
It was not by my hand that I am once again given flesh. I was brought here by
humans who wished to pay me tribute.
Richter Belmont: Tribute?! You steal men's souls and make them your slaves!
Dracula: Perhaps the same could be said of all religions.
Castlevania: Symphony of the Night
Alright, now see this? This is a four-way road, OK? And dead in the center is a
crisp, new, hundred dollar bill. Now, at the end of each of these streets are
four people, OK? Are you following?
Banky: Good. Over here, we have a male-affectionate, easy to get along with, non-political agenda lesbian. Down here, we have a man-hating, angry as fuck, agenda of rage, bitter dyke. Over here, we got Santa Claus, and up here the Easter Bunny. Which one is going to get to the hundred dollar bill first?
Holden: What is this supposed to prove?
Banky: No, I'm serious. This is a serious exercise. It's like an SAT question. Which one is going to get to the hundred dollar bill first? The male-friendly lesbian, the man-hating dyke, Santa Claus, or the Easter bunny?
Holden: The man-hating dyke.
Banky: Good. Why?
Holden: I don't know.
Banky: Because the other three are figments of your fucking imagination!
I just have to get something.
[Pulls out a huge stack of porno books]
Holden McNeil: Who are you, Larry fucking Flynt? What are you going to do with all of those?
Banky Edwards: Read the articles. What do you think I'm going to do with them? They're stroke books.
Holden McNeil: You've got like thirty books there! We're only there for two days!
Banky Edwards: Variety's the spice of life. I like a wide selection. Sometimes I'm in the mood for nasty close-ups, sometimes I like them arty and air-brushed. Sometimes it's a spread brown-eye kind of night, sometimes it's girl-on-girl time. Sometimes a steamy letter will do it, sometimes -- not often, but sometimes -- I like the idea of a chick with a horse.
You're chasing Amy.
Holden McNeil: What?
Silent Bob: You're chasing Amy.
Jay: What are you so surprised about? The fat bastard does this all the time. He thinks just because he don't say anything, it'll have, like, this huge impact when he does open his fucking mouth.
You said you only had sex with three different guys; you never mentioned him!
Veronica Loughran: Because I never HAD sex with him.
Dante Hicks: You sucked his dick!
Veronica Loughran: We went out a few times. We never had sex but we fooled around.
Dante Hicks: Oh my God, WHY did you tell me you only had sex with three different guys?
Veronica Loughran: Because I DID only have sex with three different guys; that doesn't mean I didn't just go with people.
Dante Hicks: Oh my God, I feel so nauseous!
Veronica Loughran: I'm sorry, Dante, I thought you understood!
Dante Hicks: I did understand! I understood that you had sex with three different guys and that's all you said!
Veronica Loughran: Please calm down.
Dante Hicks: How many?
Veronica Loughran: Dante...
Dante Hicks: How many dicks have you sucked?
Veronica Loughran: Let it go!
Dante Hicks: How many?
Veronica Loughran: All right, shut up a second and I'll tell you! Jesus! I didn't freak out like this when you told me how many girls you fucked!
Dante Hicks: This is different, this is important. How many?
[long pause as customer buys something]
Dante Hicks: Well?
Veronica Loughran: Something like... 36.
Dante Hicks: What? Something like 36?
Veronica Loughran: Lower your voice.
Dante Hicks: Wait a minute, what is that anyway, something like 36? Does that INCLUDE me?
Veronica Loughran: Ummm...37.
Dante Hicks: I'm 37?!
Alex: There was me, that is Alex, and my three droogs, that is Pete, Georgie and Dim. And we sat in the Korova Milkbar, trying to make up our razudoks what to do with the evening. The Korova Milkbar sold milk-plus; milk plus vellocet or synthemesc or drencrom, which is what we were drinking. This would sharpen you up and get you ready for a bit of the old ultra-violence.
A Clockwork Orange
["Sweet Home Alabama"
plays in background.]
Garland Greene: Define irony: a bunch of idiots dancing around on a plane to a song made famous by a band that died in a plane crash.
David Berkowitz, Ted Bundy, Richard Speck...
Alice: What about them?
Jerry: Serial killers. Serial killers only have two names. You ever notice that? But lone gunmen assassins, they always have three names. John Wilkes Booth, Lee Harvey Oswald, Mark David Chapman...
Alice: John Hinckley. He shot Reagan. He only has two names.
Jerry: Yeah, but he only just shot Reagan. Reagan didn't die. If Reagan had died, I'm pretty sure we probably would all know what John Hinckley's middle name was.
Eric Draven: Suddenly their came a tapping, as of someone gently rapping, rapping at my chamber door. You heard me rapping, right?
Eric Draven: Mother is the name for God on the lips and hearts of all children. Do you understand? Your daughter is waiting for you out on the streets.
Sarah: If the people we love are stolen from us, the way to have them live on is to never stop loving them. Buildings burn. People die. But real love lives forever.
Top Dollar: Dad gave me this. Fifth birthday. He said, "Childhood's over the moment you know you're gonna die."
Eric Draven: They're all dead. They just don't know it yet.
Eric Draven: Victims; aren't we all?
Eric Draven: it can't rain all the time.
T-Bird: Abashed the Devil stood and felt how awful goodness is.
Eric Draven: Little things use to mean so much to Shelley -- I thought they were kind of trivial. Believe me, nothing is trivial.
What? You have air-conditioning in Hell?
The Devil: Sure! Fucks up the ozone layer!
John Milton: Let me give you a little inside information about God. God likes to watch. He's a prankster. Think about it. He gives man INSTINCTS! He gives you this extraordinary gift, and then what does He do, I swear for His own amusement, his own private, cosmic gag reel, He sets the rules in opposition. It's the goof of all time. Look but don't touch. Touch, but don't taste! Taste, don't swallow. Ahaha! And when you're jumpin' from one foot to the next, what is he doing? He's laughin' His sick, fuckin' ass off. He's a tight-ass! He's a sadist! He's an absentee landlord. Worship THAT? NEVER!
The Devil's Advocate
Harry Callahan: I know what you're thinking. Did he fire six shots or only five? Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement, I've kinda lost track myself. But being as this is a .44 Magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world, and would blow your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself one question: Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya punk?
Metatron: Noah was a drunk. Look what he
accomplished. And no one's even asking you to build an ark. All you have to do
is go to New Jersey.
Bethany: New Jersey.
Metatron: Sure. Go to New Jersey and visit a small church on a very important day. Agreed?
Bethany: That doesn't sound like a crusade.
Metatron: Aside from the fine print, that's it.
Bethany: What's the fine print?
Metatron: [mumbling into glass] Stopacoupleofangelsfromenteringandthusnegatingallexistence. Damn, this is good tequila.
Bethany: Wait, wait, wait. Repeat that.
Metatron: "Damn, this is good tequila"?
Bethany: The first part.
Metatron: Details. Stop a couple of angels from entering and thus negating all existence. God, I hate when people need it spelled out for them.
May I ask what brought you here?
Jay: Some fuck named John Hughes.
Bethany Sloane: "Sixteen Candles" John Hughes?
Jay: You know that guy, too? That fuckin' guy. He made this flick "Sixteen Candles." Not bad. There's tits in it, but no bush, but Ebert over here don't give a shit about that kind of thing 'cause he's, like, all in love with this John Hughes guy. He goes out and rents, like, every one of his movies. Fuckin' "Breakfast Club," where all these stupid kids actually show up for detention. Fuckin' "Weird Science," where this chick wants to take her gear off and get down, but oh no, she don't 'cause it's a PG movie. And then, "Pretty in Pink," which I can't even watch with this tubby bitch anymore, 'cause every time we get to the part where the redhead hooks up with her dream guy, he starts sobbin' like a little bitch with a skinned knee and shit. And there's nothing worse than watchin' a fuckin' fat man weep. Jay: See, all these movies take place in a town called Shermer, in Illinois. And there's all this fine bush running around, and we could kick all the dude's asses because they're all whiney pussies. Except Judd Nelson - he was harsh. But best of all, there was no one selling weed. So I says to Silent Bob "Man, we could live phat if we were the blunt-connection in Shermer, Illinois!" So we collected some cash we were owed, and caught a bus. But when we got here, you know what we found out? There is no Shermer in Illinois. What kind of shit is that?! Fucking movies are bullshit!
Then - I don't mean to sound ungrateful - but what are you doing hanging around?
Jay: We're here to pick up chicks.
Bethany: Excuse me?
Jay: We figure an abortion clinic is a good place to meet loose women. Why else would they be there unless they like to fuck?
Rufus: White folks only want to hear the good shit: life eternal, a place in God's Heaven. But as soon as they hear they're getting this good shit from a black Jesus, they freak. And that, my friends, is called hypocrisy. A black man can steal your stereo, but he can't be your Savior.
The humans have besmirched everything bestowed on them. They were given
Paradise, they threw it away. They were given this planet, they destroyed it.
They were favored best among all His endeavors, and some of them don't even
believe He exists! And in spite of it all, He's shown them infinite fucking
patience at every turn. What about us? I once asked you to lay down the sword
because I felt sorry for them. What was the result? Our expulsion from Paradise!
WHERE WAS HIS INFINITE FUCKING PATIENCE THEN?! IT'S NOT FAIR! We've paid our
debt. Don't you think it's time we went home?
Bethany: Jesus didn't have any brothers or
sisters. Mary was a virgin.
Rufus: Mary gave birth to CHRIST without having known a man's touch, that's true. But she did have a husband. And do you really think he'd have stayed married to her all those years if he wasn't getting laid? The nature of God and the Virgin Mary, those are leaps of faith. But to believe a married couple never got down? Well, that's just plain gullibility.
Gun Salesman: We call this piece the
Fecalator. One look at it and the target shits him or herself. Try it on.
Loki: Well, it's a lot more compact than the flaming sword, but it's not nearly as impressive. Just doesn't have that wrath-of-the-Almighty edge to it. I mean, come on, how am I supposed to strike fear into the hearts of the wicked with this thing? Look at this...
Bartleby: Well, then, you know, don't use a gun. Just lay the place to waste, like.
Loki: Easy for you to say. You get off light in razing. You got to stand there and read at Sodom and Gomorrah, I had to do all the work.
Bartleby: What work did you do? You lit a few fires!
Loki: I rained down sulfur, man, there's a subtle difference.
Bartleby: Oh, yeah, I'm sure.
Loki: You know, fuck you, man, any moron with a pack of matches can start a fire. Raining down sulfur is like an endurance trial. Mass genocide is the most exhausting practice one can engage in. Next to soccer.
George Carlin: The longer you listen to this abortion debate, the more you hear the phrase "sanctity of life," "sanctity of life." You believe in it? Personally, I think it's a bunch of shit. I mean, life is sacred? Who said so? God? Hey, if you read history, you realize that God is one of the leading causes of death.
Back in Town
Ray Barboni: I'm from Miami-fuckin'-Beach
and you wanna show me the ocean, huh? And what about sun, does it ever shine
around here, or is this smog around all the time?
Bobby: They say the smog is the reason we have such beautiful sunsets.
Ray Barboni: That's what they say, huh? What a bunch of fuckin bullshit.
Ray "Bones" Barboni: Let me
explain something to you. Momo is dead. Which means everything he had now
belongs to Jimmy Cap, including you. Which also means, when I speak, I speak for
Jimmy. E.g., from now on, you start showing me the proper fuckin' respect.
Chili Palmer: "E.g." means "for example". What I think you want to use is "i.e.".
Ray "Bones" Barboni: Bullshit! That's short for "ergo".
Chili Palmer: Ask your man.
Bodyguard: To the best of my knowledge, "e.g." means "for example".
Ray "Bones" Barboni: E.g., i.e., fuck you! The point is this: When I say "jump", you say "OK", okay?
Roma: All train compartments smell vaguely of shit. It gets so you don't mind it. That's the worst thing that I can confess. You know how long it took me to get there? A long time. When you die you're going to regret the things you don't do. You think you're queer? I'm going to tell you something: we're all queer. You think you're a thief? So what? You get befuddled by a middle-class morality? Get shut of it. Shut it out. You cheated on your wife? You did it, live with it. You fuck little girls, so be it. There's an absolute morality? Maybe. And then what? If you think there is, then be that thing. Bad people go to hell? I don't think so. If you think that, act that way. A hell exists on earth? Yes. I won't live in it. That's me. You ever take a dump made you feel like you'd just slept for twelve hours?
Glengarry Glen Ross
Will: Why shouldn't I work for the N.S.A.? That's a tough one, but I'll give it a shot. Say I'm working at N.S.A. Somebody puts a code on my desk, something nobody else can break. So I take a shot at it and maybe I break it. And I'm real happy with myself, 'cause I did my job well. But maybe that code was the location of some rebel army in North Africa or the Middle East. Once they have that location, they bomb the village where the rebels were hiding and fifteen hundred people I never had a problem with get killed. Now the politicians are sayin', "Send in the marines to secure the area" 'cause they don't give a shit. It won't be their kid over there, gettin' shot. Just like it wasn't them when their number was called, 'cause they were pullin' a tour in the National Guard. It'll be some guy from Southie takin' shrapnel in the ass. And he comes home to find that the plant he used to work at got exported to the country he just got back from. And the guy who put the shrapnel in his ass got his old job, 'cause he'll work for fifteen cents a day and no bathroom breaks. Meanwhile my buddy from Southie realizes the only reason he was over there was so we could install a government that would sell us oil at a good price. And of course the oil companies used the skirmish to scare up oil prices so they could turn a quick buck. A cute little ancillary benefit for them but it ain't helping my buddy at two-fifty a gallon. And naturally they're takin' their sweet time bringin' the oil back, and maybe even took the liberty of hiring an alcoholic skipper who likes to drink martinis and play slalom with the icebergs, and it ain't too long 'til he hits one, spills the oil and kills all the sea life in the North Atlantic. So my buddy's out of work and he can't afford to drive, so he's got to walk to the job interviews, which sucks 'cause the shrapnel in his ass is givin' him chronic hemorrhoids. And meanwhile he's starvin' 'cause every time he tries to get a bite to eat the only blue plate special they're servin' is North Atlantic scrod with Quaker State. So what do I think? I'm holdin' out for somethin' better. Why not just shoot my buddy, take his job and give it to his sworn enemy, hike up gas prices, bomb a village, club a baby seal, hit the hash pipe and join the National Guard? I could be elected president.
Good Will Hunting
Cereal Killer: When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child, but when I became a man, I put away childish things. What? It's Corinthians one, chapter thirteen verse eleven.
Cereal Killer: FYI man, alright. You could sit at home, and do like absolutely nothing, and your name goes through like 17 computers a day. 1984? Yeah right, man. That's a typo. Orwell is here now. He's livin' large. We have no names, man. No names. We are nameless!
[Reading from "The Hackers'
Agent Bob: "This is our world now. The world of the electron and the switch; the beauty of the baud. We exist without nationality, skin color, or religious bias. You wage wars, murder, cheat, lie to us and try to make us believe it's for our own good, yet we're the criminals. Yes, I am a criminal. My crime is that of curiosity. I am a hacker, and this is my manifesto." Huh? Right? Manifesto? "You may stop me, but you can't stop us all."
Kate Libby: God gave men brains larger than dogs' so they wouldn't hump women's legs at cocktail parties.
Brian: Get some sour cream and onion chips
with some dip, man, some beef jerky, some peanut butter. Get some Haagen-Dazs
ice cream bars, a whole lot, make sure chocolate, gotta have chocolate, man.
Some popcorn, red popcorn, graham crackers, graham crackers with marshmallows,
the little marshmallows and little chocolate bars and we can make s'mores, man.
Also, celery, grape jelly, Cap'n Crunch with the little Crunch berries, pizzas.
We need two big pizzas, man, everything on 'em, with water, whole lotta water,
Kenny Davis: That's it?
Thurgood Jenkins: Yeah, one more thing. Remember that stuff? We used to eat a whole lot of it back in the day? What was it... oh yeah, pussy.
Cocaine Addict (Bob Saget): Marijuana is not a drug. I used to suck dick for coke. Now that's an addiction. You ever suck some dick for marijuana?
Pinhead: No tears, please. It's a waste of good suffering.
Frank Cotton: I thought I'd gone to the limits. I hadn't. The Cenobites gave me an experience beyond limits... pain and pleasure, indivisible.
The Priest: You'll burn
in hell for this!
Pinhead: Such a limited imagination!
Pinhead: Human dreams... such fertile ground for the seeds of torment. You're so ripe, Joey. And it's harvest time. Save your tears. We'll reap your soul slowly We have centuries to discover the things that make you whimper. You think your nighttime world is closed to me? Your mind is so naked. A book that yearns to be read. A door that begs to be opened.
Hellraiser III: Hell on Earth
Pinhead: I am so exquisitely empty.
Pinhead: Do I look like someone who cares what God thinks?
John Trent: Every species can smell its own extinction. The last ones left won't have a pretty time with it. In ten years, maybe less, the human race will just be a bedtime story for their children. A myth, nothing more.
In The Mouth Of Madness
Louis: Eckhart saw Hell too. He said: The only thing that burns in Hell is the part of you that won't let go of life, your memories, your attachments. They burn them all away. But they're not punishing you, he said. They're freeing your soul. So, if you're frightened of dying and... and you're holding on, you'll see devils tearing your life away. But if you've made your peace, then the devils are really angels, freeing you from the earth.
Jezzie? Get me out of here.
Evil Doctor: Where do you want to go?
Jacob Singer: Home.
Evil Doctor: Home? This is your home. You're dead.
Jacob Singer: Dead? No! I just hurt my back, I'm not dead.
Evil Doctor: What are you, then?
Jacob Singer: I'm alive!
Evil Doctor: Then what are you doing here?
Jacob Singer: I don't know! [crying] Something's happening.
Evil Doctor: What IS happening?
Jacob Singer: Get me out of here.
Evil Doctor: There is no out of here. You've been killed, don't you remember?
Fallon: You guys are really pissing me off. This is cutting into my drinking time!
Renee: Brodie, I've always taken you with a grain of salt. On your birthday, when you told me to do a striptease to the theme of "Mighty Mouse," I did it. On prom night at the hotel when you told me to sleep under the bed in case your mother barged in, I said okay. And even during my grandmother's funeral when you told my relatives that you could see her nipples through her burial dress, I let that slide. But if you think I'm gonna suffer any of your shit with a smile now that we're broken up, you're in for some serious fucking disappointment!
Second suitor, would you ever make whoopie in public?
Brodie: I already did once today! But my cousin Walter jerked off in public once. True story. He was on this plane to New Mexico when all of the sudden the hydraulics went. The plane starts spinning around, going out of control, so he figures it's all over and whips it out and starts beating it right there. So all the other passengers take a cue from him and they start whipping it out and beating like mad! So all the passengers are beating off, plummeting to their certain doom, when all of the sudden, the hydraulics kick back in. The plane rights itself and they land safely and everyone puts their penises or, whatever, you know, away and deboard. No one mentions the phenomenon to anyone else.
Gill: Well, did he cum, or what?
Brodie: Jesus Christ, man! There's just some things you don't talk about in public!
President: I want the people to know that they still have 2 out of 3 branches of the government working for them, and that ain't bad.
Agent Smith: I'd like to share a revelation that I've had during my time here. It came to me when I tried to classify your species. I realized that you're not actually mammals. Every mammal on this planet instinctively develops a natural equilibrium with the surrounding environment, but you humans do not. You move to an area, and you multiply, and multiply, until every natural resource is consumed. The only way you can survive is to spread to another area. There is another organism on this planet that follows the same pattern. A virus. Human beings are a disease, a cancer of this planet, you are a plague, and we are the cure.